CPAFC

Welcome to the review of season two (November 2005 – February 2006), another exciting season in the history of our great club. As ever there were highs and lows, joy and despair, excitement and tension. Here we take a look back at them all...

After consolidating our place in the league in the previous season, this season was viewed as a full out attack on promotion and a rampage on the league. It is a measure of how far CPAFC have come from our humble beginnings that I write this review as a player playing for a division 7 club. Promotion is what we set our sights on and that is what we have achieved! Although a feeling of disappointment now lingers around CPAFC as we failed to capture the title the season has still been a massive success.

The pre season was not spent on holiday in a La Manga training camp but instead on an astro turf pitch in sunny Kirkstall while the team was busy recruiting players, and CPAFC fielded our new star player James Wood in the disappointing opening day defeat against Giant Robot. It was only a narrow win by the Robots and this gave us a sense of optimism for the season. We knew that we could do better!

We enjoyed our first victory of the new campaign in the following game at Liverpool Pensioners in a stunning match which ended with the mighty CPAFC running out 4-2 victors thanks to a man of the match performance from Jim Boorman. Pre-season League favourites BMFC were the next visitors and in a superb display CPAFC stormed the match to prevail as 8-6 winners and the new team to beat! This was CPAFC’s first ever back to back victories and showed everyone how we had matured as a team and as a unit.

That win took CPAFC to our then highest ever League position of 2nd spot, and there was real belief that the season could see a real promotion challenge take shape. This belief was cemented in the next game with a 6-3 mauling of Dynamic 5 where we ran wild with goals from the Shearer and Sutton of CPAFC Caves and Kennedy and a four goal haul from the CPAFC Shevchenko James Wood. This match was then followed by a 4-1 win against The Finland Cod Hunters.

Moral was high and everything we tried was pulling off, we were playing with confidence and the new found belief shined through in everyone’s performance, Not So Goodfellows were the next team to crumble at the feet of the now mighty CPAFC. A 12-4 victory was our reward for all our hard work and man of the match James Wood scored a tremendous 6 goals surpassing last seasons top goalscorer Greame Kennedy’s record of 5 goals in a game.

A new team entered the league in early December under the name Elite, but visibly jaded by the attacking play from CPAFC the new team were defeated in a superb 9-5 match. Performances had improved greatly and although consistency was lacking at times we were shaping up as true championship contenders.

The win against new boys Elite was followed by a game against the then leaders Giant Robot. This was our fourth meeting with the large metal footballers and after a hard 40 minutes we came out on top winning the tough and tense game 8-5. We proved in this game that we had the guts and determination to succeed, clawing our way back from 5-3 to level it at 5-5 and then run rampant in the closing stages to wrap up the game 8-5.

There was some respite thanks to the Yule tide break but after the Christmas festivities we were off the pace, obviously a mixture of too many mince pies and not enough exercise we never truly reached our full potential and we struggled against BMFC. This was our chance to become clear leaders at the top but we blew it, James Wood was out with chronic diarrhoea and without him we seemed lost in front of goal, chances were falling to us but we were skying them or spooning them, we also lacked any real pace, everyone was to blame as the marking was forgotten and no one remembered how to run, track back or pass in a straight line. We ended up losing 2-1, which still remains our lowest ever scoring game with our consolation coming from a delightful finish by James Caves.

Morale was now sinking quicker than Vanessa Feltz in the North Sea and in the following game against Dynamic 5 we had hit our lowest ebb. Dynamic 5 played us off the park and after the 6-3 defeat our dreams of a championship and promotion looked to have been shattered. Things did however get better as we learnt that both Giant Robot and BMFC had dropped points, thanks to some unexpected results.

This left us feeling our destiny was back in our hands, the championship was still a little ambitious as BMFC had opened up a clear lead but promotion was definitely back on the cards with Giant Robot slipping up.

James Wood was back against The Finland Cod Hunters and he showed his true class but the catalyst behind the 5-2 victory was the inspirational Simon Binns with an astonishing hat trick that earned him the man of the match award. This win stretched our lead over Giant Robot to a massive 6 points and effectively made us promoted baring a mathematical disaster which would have involved us losing our remaining two games and losing our superior goal difference.

Knowing a win would grant us promotion into the Serie A of Tuesday night soccer also known as Division 7 we played with confidence against a much improved Not So Goodfellows. The first half was a bit scrappy but during the second half we unleashed an onslaught of attacking play and the oppositions defence crumbled. James Wood helped himself to a hat-trick, I ended my goal drought with a brace, picking up the man of the match award for my troubles as well and Simon Binns capped the night off with a stunningly taken left footed wonder strike.

Our final game of the season came against Elite, who were looking for revenge for their earlier 9-5 defeat. Sadly for Elite however they we’re below strength and crumbled at the feet of the rampant CPAFC in a humiliating 18-2 match which saw records broken galore; James Wood scored an amazing 7 goals, there was a hat trick of hat tricks with James Caves, Simon Binns and myself all grabbing a treble and Graeme Kennedy chipped in with a brace. This game has gone down in CPAFC folklore as it is to date our biggest ever win and like people who can remember where they were the day of the moon landing or the day Diana died, football fans all over the globe will remember where they were on January the 31st 2006 when CPAFC ran rings round their opponents and bombarded the opposition goal with a glut of goals.

We proved throughout the campaign that they can compete with the best, having beaten the League Champions 8-6 we showed that nobody in the league was infallible and the same applies to Division 7. Even though we are going into the next season as favourites for the drop I want people to play with the belief that we can win. Last season’s runners up F Unit have been promoted as champions of division 7 so lets follow their example and climb the footballing ladder all the way up to the premiership!!!!

With all the current squad having committed their future to the club, and a number of choice signings in the close season, the club will be well placed to consolidate our place as a division 7 team and push-on for an even better season 3.

Thanks for another great season guys now let’s all go out on Thursday for the awards night and drink our body weight in Boddingtons. I’ll see you there and I apologise in advance for getting drunk and exposing myself in public.

The CPAFC chairman, managing director, youth team coach, chief scout, receptionist, goal scorer extraordinaire, official merchandise supplier, website designer, caretaker, hotdog seller and biggest fan

The Right Honourable the Secretary of State for New Farnley and surrounding areas Danny Cassidy OBE

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